I’ve been purposefully not making any mention of Paris Hilton’s DUI. Kinda because I don’t care, but mostly because it’s going to do nothing to expedite her departure from the spotlight. If the bitch is more popular after homemade porn showed her giving a lackluster blow job, a one-margarita drunken driving arrest isn’t going to […]

Sometimes, when you’re on the road and you see a guy talking on his cell phone and driving like a retard, don’t you feel like telling him to shove his phone up his ASS? Yeah, me too. It looks like these guys took us literally. Ewwwwwww! Phones found inside Salvadoran inmates

It only took five months of co-habitation, but I’ve successfully made GTB as neurotic about his body as I am about mine. Having been a nonsmoker for about as long as we’ve lived together, GTB was becoming increasingly dissatisfied with the weight he’d gained in the process of quitting. Personally, I like him this way. […]

I love the British. As an English Lit major and the daughter of an avid British poetry fan, it’s only natural that I suffer from significant Anglophilia. And here, yet another reason to love those loony limeys. I mean, seriously. Who else can be so catty and so well-spoken at the same time as a […]

A few weeks ago, I let my gym membership lapse. I was short on cash, and my gym, being sort of a mom-and-pop operation, won’t let you sign up for multiple months at a time (thus taking advantage of lower per-month dues) unless you pay up front for all those months. So I went about […]