Several weeks ago, I was at the gym, finishing up a not-at-all satisfying workout when I started to ponder if it’s really worth it to even exercise when you are breastfeeding. Women are at such a disadvantage as it is, what with the relative lack of testosterone in our bodies. Add all the hormones your body produces in order to keep that lactation flowing and it’s kind of a lost cause. You can’t fight that much estrogen.

(Then Mr. Roboto came up on my iPod Shuffle and I got some of my mojo back.)

And now here I am, a month after weaning Signe completely and I feel like my hormone levels are back on track. What this means really is that I’m a total badass bitch again.

I’ve long suspected that I have an excess of testosterone (for a girl). That would explain the high libido, the love of baseball, and the aggressive, competitive tendencies. Now that I’m remembering what it feels like to be me, i.e. not suffering from estrogen and progesterone overload, I’m more convinced than ever that testosterone is my dominant biological force.

What this means on a quotidian basis is that when someone cuts me off in traffic, I no longer want to berate them for endangering my infant daughter (well, I do still kinda want to do that). Now, I want to pull them from their stupid SUV and beat them to a bloody pulp just to make an example for all the other douchebags on the road. Or when when we park next to someone who parked their car like an idiot, I have to fight the overwhelming urge to either key their car or hunt them down and make them repark.

It’s been a long 18 months since I’ve felt like this. It’s good to be back.

This entry was posted on Monday, July 13th, 2009 at 7:45 pm and is filed under Daily. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.