Hick(in a new)opolis
Y’all, I’m moving to Portland.
To some of you, this comes as no surprise because I’ve been in planning mode for a few weeks and I’ve been talking to you about it offline. For others, you’ve seen this one coming because you know I’m a sucker for a cute rock star. For the rest of you, well, it’s true. The Girl is about to become an Oregonian.
The plan is still shaking out. It is all highly dependent on circumstances not quite in my control at the moment. For instance, will my bosses let me do my job remotely from our corporate office in Lake Oswego (or Lake Big-Ego, as GTB likes to call it)? Stuff like that. But for now, my goal of co-habitating with GTB in a zip code that begins with 972.. by April 1 seems to be coming to fruition.
As sad as I am to be leaving Seattle, Portland really does feel like home in a lot of ways. Since I grew up far closer to it than Seattle, I spent a decent amount of time there as a kid. Seeing the ballet or going to the “good” malls required a trek south on I-5 to the, as I thought then, sprawling metropolis of Portland. So much of it feels familiar and homey and good. It’s kind of the perfect balance of hometown and a new adventure. It helps, too, that I’ve already got a guide whose native knowledge constantly astounds me (even if his insistence on taking I-5 EVERYWHERE we go confuses and frustrates me a little).
Of course it’s hilarious to me now, having lived in Manhattan, San Diego, and Seattle, that Portland ever seemed like a big city. That said, I’m sure it’ll take me about five years to figure out how to drive there. For one, I’m terrible with directions. And for another, Oregon drivers SUCK. I don’t care what GTB says, growing up in a state where driver’s ed isn’t required to get a license is just plain fucked up. And anyone who grew up on the Washington side of the Columbia River border can tell you how true that is. (If you’re ever stuck on SR4 behind an RV with an Oregon plate, just go ahead and drive your car into the river. It’ll be far less painful. Trust me.)
Though GTB plays the biggest role in this life change (which also means you can direct your feelings of abandonment and disbelief his way, let me know if you need his email address), there are other factors at play. One of them is a fresh realization about what a priority my family is. When I spent Christmas weekend driving the hour and fifteen minutes between Hometown and Portland, I felt a huge sense of comfort and ease. With the loss of Matt last fall, the idea of being physically close to my parents has become extremely attractive. And though I’m already in mourning at the thought of leaving my chosen family in Seattle, I know that our friendships are strong enough to withstand the three-hour drive and increased dependence on email and phone calls.
And then there’s this: my hair is better in Portland. Something about the water, I think. It’s softer and comes cleaner in the shower and dries more quickly. And even though I blow a fuse in GTB’s house every time I plug in my hair dryer, I trust that we’ll be able to find a cute little Portland house of our own with wiring that can handle my mega-wattage machine.
I’ve never been good at transitions. So the next few weeks are gonna be tough. I hate moving, I hate spending money on stupid things like boxes, and I hate that my time in Seattle already feels this finite. But I love GTB, and I can’t wait to start my life in a town that maybe isn’t quite the Opolis Seattle is, but still allows this little Hick to feel like she’s made it.
February 23rd, 2006 at 12:45 pm
I know that I am supposed to back the whole Oregon-driver thing, and I do, they suck!!!!!! But reading this makes me so sad. For about 12 years my sister has lived at least 2 hours away from me. When I moved to Renton I was psyched that I could see her in less than 30 minutes. Now it looks like it’s back to about 3 hours. I’m bummed for me, but happy for the girl!
February 24th, 2006 at 10:01 am
Hey, girl, there’s another Seattle local “returning” to the Portland area. I listen to “The Mountain” over here in Boston to keep me connected and this morning I heard that one of their D.J’s is moving to Portland (http://www.kmtt.com/showdj.asp?DJID=17263). While I’m pretty sure you don’t listen to mainstream radio, KMTT is Seattle for me.
Are we in the midst of an exodus?
February 24th, 2006 at 10:26 am
Laura, two words: God’s country.
Katie, two more words: say what you will about Oregon drivers (you and your sister are both very, very wrong about this, btw), but in terms of driving, the best part of The Girl’s big migration south is that she gets to say goodbye to Seattle’s assinine no-parking-within-30-feet-of-a-stop-sign law and the over-abundance of loading zones on every f’ing street in the city (okay, that was a few more than two–deal). Seriously, the outlying neigborhoods of Seattle are so ridiculous to park in. Think about the sheer amount of time that gets wasted, the gasoline that is expended, and the tons of pollutants that are emitted into the air every year from people driving around endlessly looking for parking on streets that contain more areas that you can’t park in than they do the opposite. Plus, it totally negates the benefits of a transit system that partially runs on electricity. Utterly insane. In fact, it’s un-American, that’s what it is.
Sorry, Girl. Your’re the one who brought up Oregon drivers. I promise I will never ever bring this up again ever. Really. I swear.
February 24th, 2006 at 11:05 am
While I agree that parking in Seattle is ridiculous, imagine how much worse it would be if a bunch of Oregonians were having to drive around looking for spots. The only reason they made it legal to park within 30 feet of a stop sign in Oregon is because they imagined the huge fatalities that would occur if Oregon drivers had to spend five extra seconds looking for parking.
February 24th, 2006 at 11:20 am
Please.
February 24th, 2006 at 5:43 pm
It really is asinine for buildings that have underground parking w/ elevators to have 30-min loading zones, and they do, esp up on Queen Anne. I will concede that point. Parking goes to Portland. As does bad drivers! But I don’t care about the parking. If I have to drive 3 hours to see her, an extra 5 minutes saved is not really a bonus.
February 24th, 2006 at 8:09 pm
As a native of the east coast, I have unilateral authority to state the following (Gigi, back me up here, please):
All native Pac NW drivers suck ass.
End of discussion (until GTB counters, that is…)
February 24th, 2006 at 8:24 pm
Ah, Katie-did, every second extra that I get to spend with The Girl is a bonus. Every moment I have to spend finding parking in Grungeville is a moment I don’t get to spend with her.
February 25th, 2006 at 12:44 pm
I gotta agree with smrtygrl on this one. While there are plenty of legit ways to argue that Washington is better than Oregon or vice versa, drivin’ ain’t one of them. All of us native NW drivers suck. We’re too nice, too passive, and because we’re all that we tend to not pay attention.
As far as parking goes, that’s largely just population density combined with topography. Puddletown’s neighborhoods are much less densely populated than Seattle’s, plus everything’s relatively flat there so available parking isn’t further compacted by hills. My evidence? The one area of Ptown that’s mildly densely populated is NW, and the parking there sucks.