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Before I went to work for The Man, I worked in publishing and for literary nonprofits, both of which allowed me plenty of opportunities to converse with hopeful authors about how to get their books into print. I’d walk the halls of the publishing houses and see piles and piles of manuscripts waiting to be read by lowly editorial assistants. I’d get package after package of first chapters from striving writers, hoping I’d have some advice about where they should send them. I’d give them the usual answer of “You’re best bet is to go to the library and look in the LMP (Literary Market Place) for like-minded publishers and editors. It’s in the reference section. Good luck.”<\/p>\n
Then they’d ask me why it was so hard to get published. My answer was the kind of cold-hearted response you’d expect from someone who has no desire to write the great American novel and is content reading and criticizing other people’s attempts at artistic brilliance: It’s hard to get published because there are so many untalented hacks sending their material to anyone and everyone who will accept it. Your stuff, even if it is good, is buried under piles of other untalented hacks’ large manilla envelopes. If an editorial assistant gets around to reading your stuff, he or she is going to be half-blind and almost completely brain fried. Your cunning turn of phrase will whizz past his or her head faster than you can crumble up a piece of paper and throw it in the garbage can. Or, really, exactly that fast.<\/p>\n
I think about this all the time now. Especially when I hear about how many bloggers are getting book deals. I’ve never had that goal, but I can understand why some of my peers do. Then I came across this <\/a> a few minutes ago.<\/p>\n It seems like every few years, there is a flurry of author controversies. Like the Doris Kearns Goodwin-Stephen Ambrose shitstorm <\/a>a couple of years ago. Now, between James Frye and Dan Brown, we look to be in the midst of another one.<\/p>\n I’m not sure why Schadenfreude has become so much a part of being a celebrity author, but it has. However, I doubt these stories will deter future (or current) crappy writers from inundating the publishing world with their dribble. Fortunately for me, I don’t have to answer their phone calls anymore.<\/p>\n Working for The Man has some perks, ya know? <\/p>\n